some people love with restraint
as if they were someday to hate
but we hated gently, carefully
as if we were someday to love...*
There's very little restraint in the love between Aries and Gemini. When
the Ram and the Twins fall in love with each other, neither will waste time wondering
if the end of the affair, or the marriage, will be blissfully happy or achingly
sad. The initial attraction between them, the magnetic pull of their carefree
natures, causes both of them to reach out toward each other trustingly, with
no worry about a far-off ending. If it should eventually occur, in whatever
form - separation, divorce or death - the memories of love as naive, exciting
and as full of blind faith as a child's heart on Christmas Eve, will soften theedges of the recollection of any sorrow or hurt they've mutually suffered.That's the beauty of the 3-11 vibration, in which genuine friendship forms the foundationnot excessively jealous (barring some Venus-her). There has been so much propaganda over the yearsThe Total Woman, and total herself by just sitting
for the empathy, from the very first hello.
Jealously can be a large troublemaker. The typical Aries girl is as jealous as
it's possible for a woman to be, without turning solid green, and she's seldom
able to recognize it rationally. It doesn't stem from a possessive nature but from
the Arian symbolic Infant's terrible fear of rejection (which would mean literal
death to an infant) and need for constant reassurance that it (she) is cherished.
The undue Aries concern over losing love to another is more understandable
when it's viewed in the light of these subconscious feelings of infantile helplessness
and total dependency upon continued and uninterrupted affection. It's a
feeling that's always present, just beneath the bright Mars bravado of independence
and self-sufficiency which is not real in any sense, only make believe
. . . . a kind of protection against further vulnerability.
The typical Gemini man is
Mars affliction in his birth chart, or an Aries Moon or Ascendent). And this is
where most of the difficulties may lie. Because, you see, she secretly would like
him to be. The least he can do is pretend he is. Whether she consciously realizes
it or not, the girl Ram rather enjoys arousing the jealous instinct in her man.
It reaffirms her importance to him, a matter that can't be reaffirmed too often
for any Aries. The Gemini male may oblige her, by granting her wish, if she
steps out of line too obviously. But most of the time he'll be too busy changing
his clothes, his moods, his ideas, his dreams and his disposition to pause long
enough to stop, look and listen to any innocent flirtations she's flaunting at him
in the hope of warming up his cool, detached and airy approach to life - and to
Conversely, he won't have to flaunt any flirtations in front of her to bring
on a bright green explosion. Saying good morning too intimately to Apple Annie
at the corner newspaper stand will suffice. Considering his love of freedom and
his phobia concerning emotional shackles that curb his natural gregarious activities,
a little of that will go a long way with a Gemini man. Although she must
learn to somehow either control or hide her jealous fears (if she doesn't want to
lose him), he must also learn to sympathize with her motivation for such behavior
- an inner fear that she lacks enough femininity to keep him faithful (if he
doesn't want to lose
about the slinky, sexually seductive, feather-brained, soft and sweet type of
bunny-kitten "every man yearns for," you can't blame the Aries woman for developing
a neurosis about her quick mind, her direct approach to love and her
lack of sneaky female guile - especially since she was born under the influence
of a masculine Sun Sign.
She has courage and initiative, she's energetic and ambitious - all allegedly
masculine traits. Men believe they have the market cornered on those qualities.
Haven't you been reading the Women's Liberation pamphlets? (The Aries
woman may very well be the leader of the ERA group in her community.)
What's a girl Ram supposed to do to be considered feminine - read Marabel
around murmuring "You're wonderful, darling," and never do anything on her
own? That's just about the size of it, according to Marabel and all the male
chauvinists. Skimpy, isn't it?
Oh, I suppose she could do other things to retain her femininity, like wash,
iron, cook, diaper babies, shop for clothes, gossip, iron, wash, cook, have babies -
am I repeating myself? Sorry, I was beginning to get bored. As an Aries myself,
I've never understood why a girl must be labeled "pushy" just because she knows
her own mind. If most men prefer a Stepford Wives type robot to a real woman,
that's their hang-up. Aries females, along with their Sagittarius and Leo sisters,
sometimes rival the "male chauvinist pigs" by being rather blatant "female chauvinistsows" themselves. Such feminine gender animals do exist.
I'm sorry I kept you waiting
look, don't cry... it was only an hour or two
couldn't you find something to do?I would have, if I had been you.
When he finally arrived, he read it, and exclaimed, "Oh, wow! How did you
know exactly what I was going to say?" The Aries girl who's in love with this
two-headed, twin wonder of dual desires and actions should carefully study the
difference between the word "gregarious" and the word "unfaithful," and note
"freedom" and "love," and comprehend that, to a Gemini, these two words are
synonyms. It will help to cut down on the arguments.
As for their physical compatibility, he's one of the few men who's capable of
creating the illusionary quality this woman must associate with sex. She idealizes
the sexual expression of love into a colorful, layered fabric, woven from every
book she's ever read, every movie she's ever cried over and every shining
hope she's ever held deep inside her heart. She's convinced that bells should literally
ring at the moment the two of them become one. With him, she may actually
hear them, because his imagination can supply all the fantasies she needs to
fulfill her romantic Cinderella dreams.
This sort of empathy is what causes them to initially fall in love, sometimes
at first sight (neither Sun Sign is noted for slow action). But later, it may take
more than fantasies to keep her love burning brightly, when his Gemini detachment
fails to satisfy her
imaginary. She also needs the tangible. She may begin to feel there's always a
tiny part of himself he holds back, even during their intimacy, and she could be
right. She holds nothing back, with the Aries instinct to give completely of herself.
The Mars inclination toward direct action is seldom diluted in the giving of
passion - or in the exchange of it. He may fail to arouse in her such natural (for
Rams) physical impulses, with his airy approach to lovemaking. Then she might
feel that faerie stories are empty, when there's no fire to set them ablaze, and
become bored - or, much worse, frigid.
It's a delicate area of adjustment, and the relationship will have a better
chance for success if the Moon and/or Ascendent of his birth chart is in a Fire
Sign. Otherwise, he may not be able to teach her what she's so enormously capable
of learning, after her initial inhibitions have been overcome by his idealistic
preliminaries. The Gemini Prince can kiss the Aries Princess awake, but she
may fall back asleep again if total passion is lacking, without ever really knowing
why. Then Aries Fire can turn into Aries Ice, which is a sad waste, considering
the warmth she can so generously give when the complete potential of her fiery
nature is encouraged to develop.
During one of their games of mental chess, when he's behaving in an impossible
manner, she might try saying: "I realize that you believe you understood
what I just said, but I'm not sure you caught what it was I didn't intend to imply,
for fear you might misunderstand what I believed you thought." If it confuses
him, she can say: "Good. Now you know what it's like to talk to yourself -
or rather, to yourselves. Both of you."
She might also leave this book around near him, open to this chapter, to remind
him of how dull his life would be now if she hadn't streaked across his
heart. But she should curb her impulse to hand him the book directly, and orderhim to read it immediately. Cinderella would never do that.is a difference. She should also study the meaning of the two wordstotal concept of sexual expression, which is not purely
Now, why did I write that? I've given the quick-witted Gemini men a new
verbal weapon. My apologies to Ms. Steinem, whom I greatly admire, but it is
true, Gloria, and you know it. Please don't be offended, because I'm one too.
That is, I believe anything they can do, we can do equally - and some things
better. No need to list the latter. We all know what they are. Oh, you don't?
Well, for heaven's sake - patiently and tenderly providing a gentle garden for
babes to grow in for nine months, being able to bear pain at a higher threshold
than men, possessing the common sense and esoteric logic to know that war never
solved anything, and being able to sense danger and evil, long before they appear,
are just a few of our superiorities over the masculine essence. We're also
more sensitive, intuitive and psychic, certainly more compassionate - yet far
more realistic than men. But not quite as sentimental. (You didn't know that
men are secretly sentimental? So much so that they've taught women to see the
poetry and beauty in Life too.) It's all right for the female chauvinist sows to be
aware of their own areas of both equality and superiority regarding the masculine
sex, but they should also recognize the areas of a man's equality and superiority
regarding womanhood. That's what makes true femininity and true masculinity.
With her innocent faith in miracles, it's destined that the Aries woman
someday discover a man who's looking for a real woman, and he could be a
Gemini. This man may have two heads, and twin desires, but he also possesses a
driving need to be able to play mental chess with the woman he loves. Not for
Gemini the serene siren who gazes up to him in silent, palpitating passion, because
it's easier than trying to match wits with him. He definitely falls in love
with his mind first. His heart follows after, then his physical desire. Romance
usually proceeds in just about that priority order with the Twins. As for the
Aries woman, the order is only slightly changed. She falls in love first with her
heart, her mind follows quickly after - and, finally, her physical desire. The
initial patterns are switched, but that's not as important as the fact that they
both end up on the same frequency, in its proper place - last, after mental and
emotional affinity has been established. It's an amazingly successful formula.
Because he'll appreciate the constant mental challenge of the Aries girl
(Aries rules the head, Gemini the mind, among other things), she'll eventually
learn to trust him to love her for what she is. Then she may show him what
she's allowed no other male to discover - that she can be genuinely sweet and
tender, with a man who proves he's her superior in some ways, while making it
clear at the same time that he also admires her for her own qualities, which are
equal to his, some being likewise superior. It's a complicated juggling act, but a
Gemini man can pull it off, if anyone can. His natural charm and glibness (some
people call it blarney) can keep her Mars vanity and ego appeased - and he can
certainly handle any kind of verbal debate she cares to start. She may start
quite a few.
She may have difficulty in adjusting to his typical Gemini habit of lateness.
She's often a little lax in that area herself, but Rams have a rather selfish way of
being outraged when they're forced to swallow their own medicine.
A Gemini man was once three hours late for an appointment with me. Anticipating
his excuses (one of the benefits of being an astrologer) I wrote a little
verse about him while I was waiting.
There are Aries women and Gemini men who hold hands lightly and skip down
the street together like children. There are other Aries women and Gemini men
who have sarcastic, furious verbal donnybrooks from the time they awake until
they go to bed - and they both talk in their sleep too. Often, the emotional
blending of Mars and Mercury in a love experience produces a strange alchemy
of haunting tenderness, punctuated by sharp hurt, making the relationship capable
of both triumph and disaster. It may be because Gemini, unlike the other
two Air Signs, verbalizes both his admiration and his contempt so clearly and
unmistakably. Or perhaps it's because Aries, unlike the other two Fire Signs, is
consumed by the passion of the moment, whether it's love or hate, never thinking
about tomorrow's possible regrets.
This 3-11 Sun Sign Pattern is quite distinctive in its influence over two people
linked together through its friendly, and very communicative, vibrations.
There's no doubt they'll quarrel occasionally, even frequently; yet their more
tempestuous arguments will contain the seed of spring, and fresh promises for
the future. Their misunderstandings are extremely verbal, and often quite loud,
but somehow, not too serious. It's almost as though they're both aware of the
potential of a truce in the midst of the battle.
These two might accurately say of themselves